Socks, sandals, and a mouth full of sugar.

Paris, France.

After high school I went straight into University in Montréal, and a 4 year double major in Political Science and International Development Studies at McGill, which was basically a 4 year bender. I’m talking degeneracy on a whole new level. Of course there was the first-year meal plan (aka how many different ways can we feed you highly processed carbs and cheese), and then the insane boozing, partying, clubs, raves, party drugs, no sleep, hangovers, study drugs, more alcohol, more junk food. For the first time, my body was responding to an unhealthy lifestyle. Not only was I being a total degenerate, but I was no longer hyperactive like I was in high school.

I decided to start working out at the University gym, which was probably the first time I actively took a step in the direction of health. Inspired by some guy friends that lifted weights and always drawn aesthetically to strong, lean women- I started lifting weights and really exploring that whole world of “bodybuilding” style exercise.

Following fitness models on Instagram quickly highlighted the importance that meal prepping and nutrition had in the fitness equation... I was totally hooked. At first, I knew legitimately nothing about eating well. A now good friend that I met while he was working at a supplement store reminds me every so often that one of the first things I asked him was if a banana was a carb. Safe to say I definitely started at ground zero.

Following his advice, I bought and devoured Tim Ferriss’ book “The 4 Hour Body,” which got me even more into weight lifting and using myself as a human guinea pig. At the time, a lot of my understanding of nutrition revolved around the concept of macro-nutrients (protein/ fat/ carb ratios), and Tim's book also developed my (terribly toxic) habit of “cheat days.”

My lifestyle at this point was extreme in both directions: I ate “clean” 6 days a week, exercised pretty much every day, but would still party hard, and had one day (usually Sunday) where I absolutely fucking destroyed my body with junk food. This routine continued for most of university, with enough success considering my goals at the time were pretty much vanity driven. I was lean, fairly strong, and happy with my body aesthetically, yet I still managed to eat pizza and junk regularly (cheat days), and partied harder than ever- I just made sure to sweat it out the next day.

University, in a nutshell.

(Yes, this is me... I graduated, I swear).

IT STARTS WITH FOOD

A shift happened the summer before going into my last year of university when I broke my knee and was bedridden for 6 weeks. During this time, I was completely immobile, and by some divine intervention, I picked up a book called “The End of Overeating: Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite” by David A. Kessler. Sweet Jesus, it was like I took a peak under the curtain and saw the little Wizard of Oz man sitting there with his mighty microphone. The book spoke of the food industry’s tricks for hooking us with highly-processed, nutrient-void foods. I was mind-blown and realized that it had nothing to do with “will power” and that we were being straight-up manipulated.

In the year following, I continued to read, and my passion and understanding of nutrition began to skyrocket. The more I understood the importance of a whole food diet, the less appealing drugs and alcohol became because I began realizing that everything I put inside of me was a form of information; literally programming the human that I am becoming. Cheat days started becoming less common, and I started following women in the health and wellness industry that were focusing on the nutrients in food. I began to shift my limited understanding of food as macronutrients to that of micronutrients and real nutrition.

Don’t get me wrong, my lifestyle at this point was still deeply troubling in retrospect. I was making strides to eat better, but there was still (albeit less common) the all-night liquor-fuelled benders, hung-over binges on junk food, and tonnes of caffeine. I think it’s also important to note that my relationship with food, drugs, and alcohol was never one of addiction. I had as healthy a relationship as one could possibly have with such toxic behaviors, in that my sole purpose for engaging in them was that I enjoyed them. I was having fun, I was not overtly escaping or drowning out deep, repressed emotions or trauma. This is why I find that as university came to an end, my partying and relationship with alcohol, drugs, and all the bad stuff started to fade away naturally.

In Nicaragua with the UN World Food Programme. 2010.

NICARAGUA & AND A SHIFT IN MY PURPOSE

During university, I had the opportunity to work in Nicaragua for the United Nations World Food Programme, a surreal gig for a student of political science and international development studies. This was legitimately a dream job, I wanted to save the world… and yet I came home with a bit of a rude awakening that I felt extremely unfulfilled with the experience. As I grew up during those 4 years away from home, I realized that the world does not need saving, and the very beginning of my understanding that “to change the world, you have to change yourself” started to settle in. My newfound passion for fitness and nutrition gave me fulfillment like I couldn't imagine. I began working in gyms, soaking in the latest exercise science wisdom from my personal training friends and was so drawn to the world of self-improvement. I felt that if I could help inspire people to be better, healthier versions of themselves, the positive effect would ripple across the globe.

ISLAND LIFE & PCOS

A graduation present 10-day vacation to the British Virgin Islands turned into 6-month long island adventure, which further extended itself when I later had the incredible opportunity to return to the BVI to work for Richard Branson on his private islands. There went nearly 2 years of my life that felt like a total dream: living and working in the Caribbean, in the sunshine, swimming in the turquoise ocean every day. True medicine.

It was during this time that I read Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now,” which I still distinctively remember, it made me aware that there was a past, a present, and a future. It’s not like I didn’t innately already know that, but I had never truly thought about it until that point. I definitely unlocked a door into my spiritual journey with that book and saw a new perspective of my life that could never be un-know.

During this time, I was pretty damn "healthy" physically (considering my understanding of health at the time). I was still occasionally drinking alcohol and indulging in the occasional junk but I started making the shift to eating organic meat and using all-natural body products. At some point in these 2 years, I was diagnosed with polycystic ovary syndrome.

PCOS is a “metabolic syndrome” that is somewhat complicated to explain because it has many different potential causes and symptoms according to medical and holistic practitioners, but fundamentally they agree that is causes hormonal imbalances. For me, it came to light because I had had irregular menstrual cycles from the time I stopped taking hormonal birth control (part-way through university). A quick trip to the doctor and an ultrasound later, the PCOS was diagnosed, and since I had no other symptoms or issues relating to the diagnosis- my doctor just said to "keep being healthy" and that I might have trouble conceiving a child down the line. It left a lump in my throat, but I didn't know what to make of it, so I just kept living.

Playing with the Lemurs on Necker Island. 2013. 

The 12 Apostles along the Great Ocean Road in Victoria, Australia. 2016.

AUSTRALIA

A friend, who I became extremely close with while working for the Branson’s, and I planned to meet in Australia. I was back in Canada at this point and planned to meet her in Sydney for a few weeks and then continue on my own in Aus for what I thought would be 3 months of backpacking. Up until this point, I had been a total tumbleweed, traveling around but never feeling like I wanted to settle down anywhere. I had absolutely no expectations regarding Australia, honestly I barely even Google’d the place; but on my second day in Sydney (before even making my way to the ocean) I knew I wanted to live there. I couldn’t believe what had overcome me, a feeling of being home.

TAKING BACK MY POWER

The following 2.5 years in Australia completely changed my life in ways I don’t even know how to put into words. I was managing a health store, and magical beings started flooding into my life. Living in Sydney, everyone I crossed paths with seemed to be at the forefront of the health and fitness industry. People were healthier here. I became a voracious reader and podcast listener, and things just continued to spiral upwards. I befriended people at farmer's markets, at organic stores, at gyms, on the beach. I totally dropped off drinking and partying and was surrounded by happy, healthy people that pushed me to be a better version of myself. I read about detoxing and started doing them, first juice cleansing, and with each cleanse, I began feeling better and better. I stopped consuming processed food altogether, began eating 100% organic, and stopped drinking tap water. My relationship with my body completely transformed. When I was younger, vanity drove my decisions; I wanted to look good, and I was able to do that and still treat my body like shit. Now, I wanted to thrive. I wanted to FEEL good. I started caring for my body as if I were caring for my own child. I developed a sense of respect for myself and simultaneously began taking the journey inwards to explore my mind, and my Soul. 

I started spending much more time alone. I explored meditation, sun gazing, and mindfulness. I incessantly listened to podcasts and read books that blew my mind open to the realm of the metaphysical. I stopped watching TV or reading the news. I stopped following anything related to celebrities/ Hollywood. I started seeing an Ayurvedic doctor and a holistic dentist. I spent all my free time in nature. I became attuned to the lunar cycle, to set intentions, and took complete ownership of creating the life I wanted to live. I realized how much our society disempowers the individual, from the time we experience a medicalized birth in the hospital, we are taught that the world is not safe. I started to question everything I believed to be true about health, healing, and life.

My inclination to question things is deep rooted. I was definitely a trouble maker in primary school, always getting sent to the principle’s office. In retrospect, most of the chaos I created was questioning authority and pushing the boundaries of the robotic and deeply oppressive institution that is the conventional schooling system. And for that I’m pretty damn proud of my younger self. Despite not being raised religious, I went to Catholic school- because it was the only option for french schooling in my area. In second grade (we’re talking 7 years old) all my friends we’re going through the communion ceremony, and despite being the only not-baptized kid in my grade, I was offered to join. I didn’t believe in the fairy tale, so I declined. I think you get the idea that I’ve never really been one to mindlessly follow a the herd.

My mission became this notion of taking back my power: the idea that I was responsible for my existence. That all things were happening for me, not to me. This doesn’t mean running through flower fields manifesting happiness and abundance, it means using every single experience as a way to get to know myself and to grow as a human being. So quickly, we blame others for how we feel and for what happens to us. Taking back your power means owning the good and the bad and real-eyes-ing that every “bad” situation is a launch pad for growth and transformation. It means letting go of what isn't serving your highest Good. Taking back your power means not living in fear. Fear of illness, fear of failure, fear of rejection, and ultimately fear of death.

Our society preys on our fears and insecurities to keep us asleep and slaves to the system. The vast operating system for modern society is built on fear. And so we lock ourselves away in our homes, plugged into technology, distrusting and disconnected; we fuel our loneliness with food-like-products, pharmaceutical drugs, and alcohol; we gossip to make ourselves feel better in relation to others, and we buy expensive things to fill the void of our meaningless existence. I choose not to live a life in fear, I choose to trust life, to trust my divine human intuition, and to live a life rooted in Love.

Time alone in nature = my favourite thing ever. This is solo hiking the Waihe'e Ridge on Maui, Hawaii. 2017.

Exploring in Greece. 2018.

Hiking in Bryce Canyon, Utah. 2019.

AUSTRALIA ROUND 2

After spending a year traveling through about 13 European countries and Morocco, I was called back to Australia at the end of 2019. Australia truly is a special place for me to grow. Fertile, potent soil. I had spent some time on an organic farm in Maui but being back in Aus I really got my hands dirty with regenerative agriculture, connecting with the planet, soil, and my food in the most powerful way. I also launched my podcast and spent the first year of the “pandemic” living in Byron Bay. I fell in love and was taken on a wild journey of self-exploration with the mirror of that relationship. We drove across the country together and settled in Margaret River in WA for 6 months. The relationship was not all roses and rainbows, it really served me a big dose of reality when it comes to love and the work required to sift through the many layers of my own bullshit.

Through the mirror of that relationship, I dived deep into shadow work, exploring the many ways in which I still had so much living in my proverbial basement. Not that this work is ever “done”— but our relationship really gave me the opportunity to explore things like attachment styles, inner child wounds, familial patterns, and ways in which I project my story onto the world around me.

I decided to leave Australia at the end of November 2021, when the tyranny of the pandemic reached levels I could no longer handle. I am for body sovereignty and autonomy, and I could no longer ignore the calling to move to Mexico.

Hiking to the top of St Mary’s Peak, in the Flinders Ranges, South Australia.

Camping at Uluru, on a road trip across Australia.

Byron Bay will always hold a special place in my heart.

MÉXICO

Mexico played an enormous role in my journey, reclaiming and embodying my femininity. My 9 months there ushered me out from behind the computer (writing and recording podcasts) and into the realm of working with women more directly. I gave birth to Oaxaca Ecstatic Dance, hosting dance and building a strong, beautiful community in Oaxaca. I hosted day retreats for women at a local regenerative farm, launched women’s circles in person and online, started working with women 1 on 1, and published my first ebooks.

Spending time with likeminded pals in Acapulco (Andy Kaufman and Max Igan), 2022.

Facilitating Temazcal for the women at an Ayahuasca retreat in Colombia, 2022.

My beautiful temazcaleras and sisters Maria and Leahy, 2022.

My very first women’s retreat at Tierra Del Sol, in Oaxaca, Mexico.

Hawai’i

In September of 2022, my now partner and love of my life, River, came to visit me in Oaxaca. It took all of one look at him in person to know he was the one. It was a no-brainer to make the move to Texas where he was living at the time. After 8 months in Austin, we decided to make the move to Hawai’i, where we now live on the North Shore of O’ahu. Our relationship is the total co-manifestation of all our inner work and of the dedication I have made to healing my wounds and my devotion to Truth. He never ceases to amaze me with his capacity to love, and the life we’re building together is a true testament that we can create the life of our dreams if we are willing to face the totality of our being.

River and I on the Big Island of Hawaii, Jan 2023

INNER PEACE

Today, one of my biggest values is inner peace. Having fully healed my PCOS symptoms, I am so deeply aware that the diagnosis was in fact a call home— back to my body, back to my feminine essence, and a deep wake up call to slow the hell down. I prioritize nervous system regulation and nourishing my adrenals.  I also understand that long term inner peace requires going through periods of chaos (shadow work, communication, difficult conversations and even arguments) but that the chaos needs to be built on the foundation of a fundamentally soft and nourished body and soul. To cycle through the light and darkness, allowing them to feed and fuel the next cycle of the journey.

BECOMING FULLY HUMAN

My life has pretty much always been an open book, and so sharing my knowledge on a platform like this comes naturally (I’m a Capricorn North Node!). Since realizing the power that inspirational beings have had on my journey, I have tried to be as vulnerable and honest in sharing my experience. I live my life passionately; fearlessly diving into experiences, saying yes to life. Whether it be a 10-day silent meditation retreat with no previous mediation experience, sitting with various plant medicines, living off-the-grid in Maui, refusing to take prescribed antibiotics for an infection and instead successfully healing myself with a self-prescribed herbal protocol, or leaving Australia to start a free life in Mexico— I am here to live life to the fullest, in my full power, and continue the process of unraveling.

My website is here to help inspire you to take back your power, to explore what it means to be human and to become the fullest version of your Self. To wake up to a world that is always working for you, supporting you. To take responsibility for how you feel, for what you think, for what you say, and for what you do. I am here to remind you to question everything, including your own beliefs. And all the while not taking life too seriously... because at the end of the day we're all just meat puppets stuck to a big rock, flying through space.

This human life is truly a gift, and I hope my words inspire you in some way to walk the path towards becoming a full expression of yourself, towards becoming fully human.